'Christian Mingle': Why We Can't Have Nice Things

"Can I get a grande Caramel Ribbon Crunch frappucino please?"

I sit down and a small yet comfortable table at a Starbucks not far from my hotel and crack open my laptop, ready to continue writing. I do my usual internet surfing, skimming my usual websites to see if there's anything new going on. And then I...

'One Caramel Ribbon Crunch for CJ!"

Sorry about that. Anyway, I was making my daily internet rounds when I stumbled upon a recent post on Relevant Magazine titled "The 'Christian Mingle' Movie is Real". I stopped in shock and clicked on the link. I couldn't believe it. There's no way this is real. This can't be a thing. The page comes up and I click to view the trailer. It's indeed a thing. Here's what I mean:

I repeat. This is a thing. This is something I secretly fear would happen. The commercials weren't enough, now there's a movie. This is one of those times where I look up and ask God "Lord, can you come back please?"

'Christian Mingle', releasing in October of this year, will apparently follow someone with nothing els Gwenyth Hayden (Lacey Chabert) who is a young woman who has it all. She's (somehow) got the money, she's got the dream job and she's got the friends but there's one she she doesn't have. Common sense A man. 

-facepalm-

Her search for a man comes up short, so she does the one thing someone completely and utterly desperate would only do for the sake of a movie plot. She registers for the online dating site, Christian Mingle in order to find Mr. Right/that perfect guy/her "soulmate". Turns out, she finds one but he's a Christian (surprise surprise!) and Christianity was never her style. In an attempt to make a good impression on the-perfect-gentleman she tries her best to clean herself up and get into church but along the way she finds the hope to believe in God and comes to Christ.

Sigh. 

Needless to say, there are many, many things wrong with this. It'll take a number of years to fully address all so I'll just say this: as a Christian, I'm embarrassed.

These days, the term "Christian movie" has become laughable and I'm sure 'Christian Mingle' won't be of any help. I've always been on the fence when it came to titles under that umbrella. While I love 'The Passion of the Christ', 'Facing the Giants' and 'Courageous', I shudder at thought of 'Son of God', 'Left Behind', and 'Unstoppable'.  This will join that list. Not only does the trailer seem cheesy and downright bad, this will only add fuel to the burning flame that Christians can't be taken seriously. I'm still having a hard time convincing myself that this is actually real. 

Basically, 'Christian Mingle' not only portrays that a woman can't feel whole without a man, but that finding God along the way is just a side stop. This is going to cause a lot of problems. The pressure is already on in a lot of Christian circles for a woman to find a man to feel important. Imagine the young women who are just trying to figure this whole 'love' thing out and then they're fed this. What do you think they'll walk away with? If they feel empty, find a man. If they want true success, find a man. If they want to experience a real relationship with God, find a man. If they want love, find a man. Been single for about an hour and a half? You better find a man before you shrivel up and die. As Christians, should this be the message we're feeding young women? No.

The film isn't out yet so I'll wait until after I see it before I get too frustrated. I will say this though, as Christians we need to do better. Way better. Not only movie-wise but we have to be careful with what we endorse. Not everything that mentions God or speaks Christianese means that it's something that Christians should welcome in. We are instructed by God's Word to be careful and discern (1 John 4:1) and, more importantly, that we don't need a man or woman to be worth something because we're made in the image of God and He loves us(Romans 8:37-39).

My greatest fear is that this film will come and go without so much as a peep from the Christian community. We are quick to strike down movies except when there's a Christian label put on it, no matter how stupid it may be. We have to do better. We have to learn to discern. Most importantly, we need to realize that not everything that shouts "JESUS!" is necessarily of Christ.